I was doing so well...

And I did have things ready to post on... the 15th! Okay I guess I only procrastinated two more days after putting things off for -tsk, tsk- six days. Still if the purpose is to collect data, be honest, and put something out there than I'm still doing better than Dec. or two years ago.

So again, try to get into a comeback not setback mind frame.

I did get pretty low about the teaching videos and then in that leadership book I was reading it talked about the need to be acknowledged, and I think I don't want attention, and I don't want to brag, but that it is still something I crave. I don't need the ceremony or the awards but the friend who says, I saw what you did there and good going.

But, on the one hand there was this huge time suck going on with the videos so I did need to change directions. I flopped around and floundered for a bit, and of course the more I stay calm and reflect through the process the more clear things become. 

So, things I have finished and do feel good about: I finished my 24th journal...

And started the 25th...

I had to make some notes so I could talk to students about how important it was to not fight their parents on getting on the computer to do their work. I'm sorry parents.

That's it, I'm sorry parents. School should be the place students are learning, not the kitchen table while you try to conduct business in the living room. You already have so much change and adapting you have to do, the added curve ball of now being the teacher isn't right. I wish I could do more, I wish you could drop off the kids like normal and know they are safe.

 

But maybe a small part of me is frustrated that you are being talked back to, at school kids don't have a choice, they have to do their work. As a teacher I try to give choices about how that gets done so we don't have power struggles, but that seems to not be a skill parents have right now - so kids are pushing back and getting away with doing less than is expected of them...

Anyway, I lectured my 1st and 2nd graders about it, and according to the computer data I have, there was a bump in activity online. And of course I want to be encouraging the kids and give them examples of how I struggle and then overcome my struggles, but I can't think about next school year without drawing a complete blank, and that's tough.

(Did you see the documentary on Netflix about hallucinogens? Ben Stiller, Sarah Silvermen, Sting, and a bunch of other people share their experiences? Don't worry that note was not in my journal when I was lecturing students.)

But with all the sense of disappointment over the video projects and not knowing what next school year was going to be like (and actually gaining 8 pounds since April 1) I needed to focus on something I could control. A big project or two important ones. And I've got piles of things to work on, and as you know I've been making progress on them.

One project is going through all the materials I have collected over the past six years of teaching on collaborative activities and team-building and trying to plot the first six weeks of school where I would use that stuff, teach those procedures and routines...

But that was not very... interesting...

So I floated from one little project to another, not really finishing anything.

So I did finish putting a protective fence over the garden but not clearing out the unwanted plants along the fence and putting in another garden bed so we can plant the corn...

And then I got the book I ordered and I have this big project in mind for this, but I need to make a plan so I know how to tackle this note-taking, possible read-aloud, alternative book club thing...

And I don't know how long I have been reading this book, I can't hardly focus to read right now with the stay-at-home being lifted to a safer-at-home and all the people not wearing masks and not maintaining social distance! I think a part of my brain is on a high alert and it is making it hard to focus... but this has been the right book to be reading right now. Try to be present, try to pause before reacting, think about the things that align with your values...

And this is the matrix I needed to come along right now. I've been using a different one that has the important and urgent quadrants but I feel like these are better because there are things that are not important to me but are to my boss or coworkers (or wife) and I feel like this matrix made the placement of things a bit more clear. So next time I will share the projects I have going on in this format!